From The Civil Justice Association of California:

Potty Protest
A man sued the City of San Diego and its baseball stadium's beer vendors demanding punitive damages for the emotional distress he suffered when women, opting for a shorter wait, used the men's room during an Elton John concert. He blamed the beer seller for causing his repeated use of the facilities. Kudos to the federal judge who eventually slapped the man and his lawyer with penalties for filing a frivolous lawsuit.

Risky Recuperation
The Bally Health Club in Torrance was sued by a couple for loss of consortium and emotional distress after the man launched a serious, though temporary, cyberspace romance with a woman he met on the Internet. The couple tried pinning the blame on Bally because, if the man hadn't cut his hand on a towel dispenser there and spent time at home recuperating, he wouldn't have had the time at their home computer to start roving.

Criminal Complaints
A robber making his getaway from an Oakland bank stuffed a bag of money in his pants - not knowing he'd been given marked bills and a tear gas device with a timed delay. The tear gas erupted as planned, the robber was captured, and he filed a $2 million suit against the bank, the police, and the City of Oakland for causing his burns.

"Good Sam" Suit
A mugger sued a San Francisco taxi driver who heroically broke up a mugging and captured the crook by pinning him against a building with his cab. The mugger bounced back from his conviction by suing the cab driver for $24,000 and winning! Congratulations to California voters for passing a ballot measure (Proposition 213 of 1996) which included a provision to end such nonsense.

Life in the Fast Lane
The City of Huntington Beach had to deal with a $60 million lawsuit filed by a driver accusing it of racketeering after its police had awarded him three speeding tickets.

Contentious Kin
A man sued his godmother for injuring his knee when she dropped her end of the piano she'd asked him to help move.

Mickey Unmasked
Disneyland was hit with a lawsuit for the emotional distress incurred by several children who observed some of the park's Disney cartoon characters taking off their costumes and discovered that they were, in fact, make-believe!

Size Matters
Software companies around the state were sued for millions of dollars for selling their disks in shrink-wrapped, retail boxes that were "too large." Special commendation to the California Legislature for passing a law in 1997 to end this attempted legal extortion.

Rocky Road
The City of Simi Valley was stunned by a lawsuit accusing it of maintaining its property in a dangerous condition after an 11-year-old boy ran over his own finger while skateboarding on a city sidewalk.

Wanted: Hot Tub Lifeguard
The YMCA in Santa Clara County was accused of negligence in a lawsuit claiming it had failed to provide a lifeguard for a Jacuzzi that was 7 feet 4 inches wide, 7 feet 10 inches long, and 3 feet 6 inches deep.

Classless Actions No. 1
Lawyers in a class action "shareholder" lawsuit against Occidental Petroleum were set to get $3 million in fees while the people they supposedly represented were to get zero. When a shareholder tried to protest the lawyers' fees, they claimed he had no right to appear in court because he didn't have a stake in the settlement!

Classless Actions No. 2
A Bay Area attorney bringing a $40 million class action anti-trust suit against United Parcel Service met with a UPS lawyer and offered to drop the suit in exchange for "fees" of $8 to $10 million with no payment to any members of the class.

Lawyers as Plaintiffs
Two attorneys who were longtime friends and ski buddies crashed into one another on the slopes at Alpine Meadows resort. One sued the other for damages, citing a county ordinance requiring skiing "in a safe and reasonable manner."

Wannabe Lawyers as Plaintiffs
A failing law student sued Western State University College of Law for not adequately warning her that students with admission exam scores like hers have a minimal chance of becoming lawyers.

From multiple sites about "The Stella Award":

· In 1994, a New Mexico jury awarded $ 2.9 million in damages to 81-year-old Stella Liebeck, who suffered third-degree burns to her legs, groin, and buttocks after spilling a cup of McDonald's coffee on herself.

· January 2000: Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running amok inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little prick was Ms. Robertson's son.

· June 1998: A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal the car's hubcaps.

· October 1998: A Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up, because the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation. Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. Mr. Dickson sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of half a million dollars.

· October 1999: Jerry Williams of Little Rock Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in it's owner's fenced-in yard with Mr. Williams. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog may have been provoked by Mr. Williams who, at the time, was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

· May 2000: A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on soft drink and broke her coccyx. The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson threw it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

· December 1997: Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

· And just so you know that cooler heads do occasionally prevail: Kenmore Inc., the makers of Dorothy Johnson's microwave, were found not liable for the death of Mrs. Johnson's poodle after she gave it a bath and attempted to dry it by putting the poor creature in her microwave for "just a few minutes, on low." The case was quickly dismissed.

From The Citizens Against Lawsuit Abuse (CALA):

· It wasn't a ghost, just a flying T-shirt: (Burbank, CA). A man in the audience to watch "The Tonight Show" sued the show, NBC and Jay Leno after he was struck in the face with a souvenir T-shirt. Claiming pain and suffering, disability, lost wages, emotional distress, humiliation and embarrassment, the man asked for $25,000. (Los Angeles Times, online edition, 12/5/99)

· Cancel Halloween (again), "fright" really is a cause of action: (New York, NY). After experiencing 28 seconds of turbulence on an airline flight, 12 passengers heaved up a lawsuit over their "fear of dying." They won $2 million. (Miami Herald, July 25, 2000)

· A victim of the "witches brew": (Las Vegas, NV). A California man sued the Las Vegas Hilton and Mandalay Bay Hotel Casino claiming the casinos were negligent in allowing him to gamble away more than $1 million while he was drunk. He is seeking unspecified compensatory and punitive damages, and he wants the casinos to be precluded from seeking to prosecute him criminally. (Las Vegas Sun, January 12, 2000)

· Attack of the Killer Sneakers: (New York, NY). A woman sued the Nike corporation earlier this year claiming that her sneakers caused her to fall while running and permanently injure her wrist. She sued for $10 million, claiming negligence, product liability and breach of warranty. (Reuters, April 6, 2000).

· Next time try lightning. It worked for Dr. Frankenstein when he needed to jump-start a brain: (Tampa, FL). A Florida man went out for some drinks and, after working up a good drunken stupor, climbed up a transformer tower. He was shocked by 13,000 volts of electricity and thrown nearly 40 feet. He then sued six bars and stores that "negligently served or sold him alcohol." He also sued the Tampa Electric company, saying the utility didn't do enough to prevent him from breaking into the fenced, gated and locked substation and scaling the transformer. (Reuters, March 3, 2000).

· Speaking of Dr. Frankenstein, and misplaced body parts: (New York, NY). A New York jury awarded a former exotic dancer $30,000 to compensate her for the "anguish" she suffered when a doctor used silicone breast implants to enlarge her buttocks. The doctor claims he did everything by the book. The plaintiff said, "I looked like I had two (breasts) on my butt." (Associated Press, June 12, 2000).

· Wrath of the snake woman: (Santa Ana, CA). A local telephone company erroneously listed an attorney's name under "Reptiles." It was an error that became the source of jokes everywhere from local newspapers to Jay Leno. Being of something less than good humor, the attorney filed a libel lawsuit seeking $100,000 in damages from the phone company. (Los Angeles Times, April 25, 2000).

· Haunted by Lawsuits: (London and Tennessee). Six years after the famous McDonalds "hot coffee lawsuit" made the US civil justice system the laughingstock of the world, McDonalds has remained a favorite target of lawsuits over food mishaps. In London, several McDonalds customers are suing over hot coffee, hot tea and even hot water. In Tennessee, it was a pickle that did the damage, as a woman sued the restaurant for $110,000 after a hot pickle from a hamburger fell on her chin. (Reuters, August 2, 2000 and The Los Angeles Times, October 8, 2000)

From Duhaime.org:

· An inmate filed a $5 million lawsuit against himself (he claimed that he violated his own civil rights by getting arrested) -- then asked the state to pay because he has no income in jail. He said, "I want to pay myself $5 million dollars, but ask the state to pay it on my behalf since I can't work and am a ward of the state." The judge was not impressed by his ingenuity, and dismissed the suit as frivolous. (Source: CALA)

· A convicted bank robber on parole robbed a California Savings and Loan Branch. The bank robber placed the money roll containing the hidden Security Pac in his front pants pocket. The Security Pac released tear gas and red dye resulting in second and third degree burns requiring treatment at a hospital. The bank robber sued the bank, the Security Pac manufacturer, the city the police and the hospital. (Source: ATRA: Candelario v. City of Oakland, No. 628960-3 Cal. App. Dep't Super. Ct. 1987)

· A writer was sued for $60 million dollars after writing a book about a convicted Orange County serial killer. Although the inmate is on death row, he claimed that he was innocent in all 16 murders, so the characterization of him as a serial killer was false, misleading and "defamed his good name". In addition, he claimed those falsehoods would cause him to be "shunned by society and unable to find decent employment" once he returned to private life. The case was thrown out in a record 46 seconds, but only after $30,000 in legal fees were incurred by the writer's publisher. (Source: CALA)

· A minister and his wife sued a guide-dog school for $160,000 after a blind man learning to use a seeing-eye dog trod on the woman's toes in a shopping mall. Southeastern Guide Dogs Inc., a 13-year old guide-dog school and the only one of its kind in the Southeast, raises and trains seeing-eye dogs at no cost to the visually impaired. The school is located about 35 miles south of Tampa. The lawsuit was brought by Carolyn Christian and her husband, the Rev. William Christian. Each sought $80,000. The couple filed suit 13 months after Ms Christian's toe was stepped on and reportedly broken by a blind man who was learning to use his new guide dog, Freddy, under the supervision of an instructor. They were practicing at a shopping mall. According to witnesses, Ms Christian made no effort to get out of the blind man's way because she "wanted to see if the dog would walk around me". (Source: ATRA and Houston Chronicle, 95-10-27)

· A woman was treated by a psychiatrist from March to November 1986, became romantically involved with him, and subsequently married him in October of 1989. After more than five years of marriage they divorced in 1995, at which time the woman sued her ex-husband for psychiatric malpractice and negligence claiming that the romantic or sexual relationship between them started before the formal psychiatric treatment ended. She contended that her ex-husband had breached the standard of care as a psychiatrist by becoming romantically involved with her, and sought general, special and punitive damages. (Source: CALA)

· A woman in Israel is suing a TV station and its weatherman for $1,000 after he predicted a sunny day and it rained. The woman claims the forecast caused her to leave home lightly dressed. As a result, she caught the flu, missed 4 days of work, spent $38 on medication and suffered stress. (Source: CALA)

· A Los Angeles attorney sued another attorney who had hung a cardboard tombstone in his office that read, "R.I.P./Jerry Garcia (a few too many parties perhaps?)." The plaintiff lawyer, a Garcia groupie, alleged this joke caused him "humiliation, mental anguish, and emotional and physical distress" after seeing the sign. He further added that he had suffered injury to his mind and body (specifics were not listed in the suit). (Source: CALA)

· A woman was playing golf and hit a shot which ricocheted off railroad tracks that run through the course. The ball hit her in the nose and she won $40,000 because the golf course had a "free lift" rule (this allows golfers to toss balls which land near the rails to the other side). The woman alleged that because the course allowed a free lift, they were, in effect, acknowledging the rails to be a hazard. (Source: CALA)

· A surfer recently sued another surfer for "taking his wave." The case was ultimately dismissed because they were unable to put a price on "pain and suffering" endured by watching someone ride the wave that was "intended for you." (Source: CALA)

· A woman went into a Northridge discount department store to buy a blender. She decided to take the bottom box from a stack of four blenders from an upper shelf used to store extra stock. When she pulled out the bottom box, the rest of the boxes fell. She sued the store for not warning customers from taking stock from the upper shelf and for stacking the boxes so high. She claimed to sustain carpal tunnel syndrome and neck, shoulder and back pain. (Source: CALA)

· A college student in Idaho decided to "moon" someone from his 4th story dorm room window. He lost his balance, fell out of his window, and injured himself in the fall. Now the student expects the University to take the fall; he is suing them for "not warning him of the dangers of living on the 4th floor". (Source: CALA)

· A jury awarded $178,000 in damages to a woman who sued her former fiance for breaking their seven-week engagement. The breakdown: $93,000 for pain & suffering; $60,000 for loss of income from her legal practice, and $25,000 for psychiatric counseling expenses. (Source: CALA)

· A woman driving a car collided with a man who was riding a snowmobile. The man died at the scene. Since his snowmobile had suddenly cut in front of her, police said she was free of blame. She sued the man's widow for the psychological injuries she suffered from watching the man die. (Source: CALA)

· While climbing a mountain, a young man slipped and fell 90 feet and sustained injuries. The mountain rescue unit, which has saved hundreds of lives over the past 30 years, worked with a physician and a paramedic to mount a difficult nighttime helicopter rescue. The rescuers probably saved the man's life...but he turned around and slapped then with a $12 million lawsuit. (Source: AVALA)

· A woman cut her hand while using a knife to separate frozen hors d'oeuvres that she bought at a supermarket. She sued the supermarket, and the manufacturer and packager of the frozen food item. (Source: AVALA)

· A woman dropped some burglar bars on her foot. She claimed that her neighbor, who was helping her carry the bars, had caused the accident. The neighbor's insurance company offered to settle the dispute by paying her medical bills, but she refused. She wanted more and sued for damages, including "pain and suffering." The jury took only 17 minutes to unanimously decide that the woman was fully responsible for her own injuries. The innocent neighbor had to pay $4,700 in defense costs. The two are no longer friends. (Source: AVALA)

· A bank discovered that millions of dollars deposited in an account were in fact embezzled funds. The bank transferred the funds back to the lawful owner and got sued! The embezzler's alleged accomplice filed a lawsuit against the bank for returning the money, and asked for $20 million in damages. The bank won in court, but only after spending over $20,000 in legal fees. (Source: AVALA)

· A man joined a group to learn, among other things, to fly through self-levitation. Unsatisfied with the results, he claimed psychological and physical damages and sued the group for $9 million. (Source: AVALA)

· A man was invited to his parents' house to celebrate the Fourth of July. He became intoxicated. And when one of the firework she brought with him to the party did not ignite, he went over to inspect it, and it exploded in his face. He sued his parents, the co-worker who sold him the fireworks, and his employer. (Source: AVALA)

· A drunk driver was speeding, careened passed detour signs and crashed. He sued the engineering firm that designed the road, the contractor, four subcontractors and state highway department property which owned both sides of the road. Five years later, all of the defendants settled for $35,000. The engineering firm was swamped with over $200,000 in legal costs. (Source: ATRA)

· A man sued Anheuser-Busch for $10,000 for false advertising. He claimed that he suffered physical and mental injury and emotional distress from the implicit promises in the advertisements. When he drank the beverage, success with women did not come true for him plus, he got sick. The Michigan Court of Appeals affirmed a lower-court decision dismissing the case. (Source: ATRA)

· Inmates at a county jail sued for cruel and unusual living conditions: bunk beds, cells lacking a sink and toilet, and no way to exercise in the winter. These criminals were awarded $2 million dollars, paid by the taxpayers of Massachusetts. Each inmate who was a party to the suit got $10 tax-free, for each day he was jailed. Their award included damages plus 12% interest from the time the case was settled until the time they collected their windfall. (Source: ATRA)

· A San Diego man filed a $5.4 million lawsuit in March against the city of San Diego for the "emotional trauma" he suffered at an Elton John-Billy Joel concert, held at a municipal stadium. Bob Glaser said he was "extremely upset" at the sight of a woman in front of him using a urinal. In the suit, he claimed his rights to privacy were violated when he tried to use the restroom ''in front of women in the men's bathroom''. The women used the men's facilities because of long lines outside their restrooms. (Source: ATRA and SAALA)

· A New York appeals court rejected a woman's lawsuit against the company that makes the device called "The Clapper", which activates selected appliances on the sound of a clap. She claimed she hurt her hands because she had to clap too hard in order to turn her appliances on: "I couldn't peel potatoes (when my hands hurt). I never ate so many baked potatoes in my life. I was in pain." However, the judge said she had merely failed to adjust the sensitivity controls. (Source: ATRA and SAALA)

· John Carter, a New Jersey man sued McDonald's for injuries he sustained in an auto accident with one of their customers. He claimed that the customer who hit him did so after spilling the contents of his chocolate shake (which he purchased from McDonald's) onto his lap while reaching over for his fries. He alleged that McDonald's sold their customer food knowing he would consume it while driving and without announcing or affixing a warning to the effect "don't eat and drive." The court concluded that McDonald's had no duty to warn customers of obvious things which they should expect to know, but refused McDonald's request for attorney's fees stating that the plaintiff's attorney was "creative, imaginative and he shouldn't be penalized for that." This case was in the court system for three years, underwent appellate court review and cost McDonald's over $10,000. (Source: ATRA and SAALA)

· Ron Goldman was on his way home from his restaurant job on June 12, 1994, when he stopped at the home of Nicole Simpson to return a pair of glasses she had left there. Attorney Nick O'Malley has recently filed a worker's compensation claim on behalf of the O. J. Simpson murder victim, using an obscure legal principle that allows private citizens to take legal action on behalf of the state. Because Goldman had no fund for injured workers; O'Malley could keep up to 15 percent of the money. Goldman's father, dismissed the claim as a "scam," while the family's attorney, called it "one of the most despicable things I've seen." (Source: CNN News)

For even more, check out Eric Deckers' Stupid Lawsuits Page